by Lois Runk

Youth in our group often say their real friends are their church friends. They’re more loyal and faithful

Sunday evening. The church was busy, with youth everywhere. Before supper we called the group together in a large circle and invited them to introduce any visitors they had brought. Andy introduced his friend and classmate Spence, saying that they played together in a band. As a youth leader I made sure I met Spence and let him know how happy I was to have him with us.

After the small group meetings Spence came to me and said, “I want to be baptized and join the church.” Joyfully, I invited Spence to my office, and we set up a time for us to get better acquainted and talk about his baptism. I also contacted his parents, and we had time to talk.

Spence had never been to church before. When he’s baptized and joins the church, he’ll be the only Christian in his family.

Friends: All Ages
Spence’s story is typical because our youth ministry is relational. Everybody relates to someone else. For example, the most important task our volunteer youth advisors have is relating to every youth in their small groups. These adults write letters, make phone calls, and even visit homes to get to know each youth personally.

Our youth advisors affirm youth. They look for behavior that can be complimented and often write letters encouraging youth. The behavior might simply be some care or kindness one youth has shown another. Or maybe a youth has demonstrated leadership in some area. For example, when one youth did a presentation during our closing worship time a youth advisor sent a note telling her how proud we were of her. Our affirmation and peer affirmation are among the reasons many youth continue to be a part of our youth ministries.

Friends: Gifts From God

God is the inventor of the gift-giving business. God graciously gives us the greatest gift of all time in Jesus Christ. And God gives each of us other friends.

In our ministry youth and adults interact with friends and build new friendships during times for meals or snacks. Youth advisors make sure every youth is sitting with someone he or she can talk with. Advisors also look for any youth sitting alone. An adult then sits with the youth or asks another youth to do so.

Since youth need to time simply to enjoy one another, we make sure they have free time. They can play basketball, volleyball, four square, and other games. Having fun together helps youth transform friendships into meaningful relationships.

We also have “Invite a Friend Night.” Youth invite their best friends and star in a simple, low-tech video. On the video each youth introduces his or her guest. In one section of the video the youth talk about their friendships and the importance of their friends to them.

Church Friends: Forever Friends

Youth in our group often tell me that their real friends are their church friends. When I ask about the difference between church friends and other friends, I hear that church friends are more loyal and faithful in their relationships.

Youth appreciate church friends because they know they are loved and cared about just as they are. When we have a relationship with Jesus Christ, our friendships demonstrate that love.

From Lifegivers, © 1997 by Abingdon Press. This material may be reproduced for educational purposes.

© 2003 The United Methodist Publishing House. Permission is granted for copying for educational purposes.

Brought to you by your youth ministry colleagues at Cokesbury.

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